Oh, the perils of internet dating

First, an update: No, I did not get Shakespeare in the Park tickets. I got to the box office at 9:05. By 9:20, I finally found the end of the line. I sat down to read my book and at about 9:45, an employee came by to tell us that there was NO WAY IN HELL we were getting tickets. Which I a) appreciated and b) suspected, seeing as the line was over half a mile long. So I went home and continued reading Harry Potter and read and read all day and finished the book. Seriously. I have no life.

Moving on.

I've blogged before about my various experiences with online dating. Most of them don't even involve actual dating, because the ratio of internet dates I've been on to hours spent perusing the profiles of losers is something to the tune of 1:802 million. 2 days ago, I decided in a fit of boredom to check out the new batch of pathetic men that have popped up on Jdate in my absence. Not because I've changed my opinions and I want to give online dating another shot, but mostly because I find great amusement in seeing what guys say about themselves to try and sound attractive. I poke around for a few minutes and I decide to look at the list of people who have viewed my profile. And, of course, someone I know pops up.

I've mentioned, in my various past blogs, what it's like being matched up with someone you know on an internet dating site. These people have ranged from high school friends to sleepaway camp friends to a friend of my ex-boyfriend to, yes, my brother (long story).

The person I found on Jdate was one of the leaders of my Israel trip from last March. He was, for lack of a better word, a huge tool. No one on the trip liked him, and I have to imagine this is because HE SUCKED. I promptly sent a text message to Lacey and my friend Ashley. Both of them laughed yet also understood my pain.

Yesterday, I went on a different dating site to try and pass the time by reading some new, yet always lame, profiles. I put in some search parameters: between 25 and 29 years old, lives within 5 miles of me, yadda yadda yadda. I scroll through the pictures and...

Wait. What is this I see? No, it can't be.

The same. Fucking. Guy. With his toolbag assface smiling at me.

Another text message to Lacey and Ashley: "OMG I just found ---- on a different dating site. F my life." Lacey responded with a nice "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA" and Ashley wrote back, "You are a match."

That is NOT even funny. Is this the caliber of men that I'm forced to be exposed to? People I already know and DO NOT LIKE?

Someone help me.