One of THOSE people

This past weekend I found myself in Brooklyn not once, but twice. I KNOW, I know.

On Saturday I went to the BK to take, and subsequently pass, my project management certification exam. Booyah! I finished around noon, and it just so happened that my good friend Rebekah was bartending a few blocks away, and so I stopped by for a visit and a celebratory cocktail that ended up turning into 3 celebratory cocktails due to some peer pressure from a few of her regulars. Which was followed by a pub crawl and me passing out at 9:45 PM but that is neither here nor there.

On Sunday I was back in Brooklyn to attend the Atlantic Antic, a big ol' street festival drinktasticathon where you walk around and listen to live music and eat street fair food and drink sangria and then go back to Rebekah's bar for free beer and to embarrass yourself in front of a guy who you thought would maybe be willing to make out with you in the future by talking about dodgeball and having him laugh at your excessive use of the word "balls" (Seriously, try talking about dodgeball without using the word "balls" - not easy).

At some point in one of the 2 days of drunken daytime revelry, Rebekah mentioned to me that in the next 6 months there will possibly be a room opening up in the apartment she shares with our other friend Marissa. It's a super cheap yet cute apartment, the roommates would obviously be fabulous as both Rebekah and Marissa fall into the category of friends that I like to call "people who are awesome but who I don't see nearly as often as I would like," and it's far enough in the future that I could seriously consider it because, fingers crossed, maybe I'll have a job by then.

Which leads me to think: could I ever be one of THOSE people? You know, THOSE people. The ones that..don't live in Manhattan.

Despite the fact that I spent the first 8 years of my life in Queens, thereby proving that I have actually already been one of THOSE people, ever since graduating college I've always just considered myself a tried and true Manhattan snob. I've lived there and worked there and played there and even though I now live in New Jersey, more of my life is in Manhattan than in the Jerz.

The thing that really intrigues me about the prospect of living in Brooklyn (aside from how cheap it is) is that it's so new to me. I don't know much about the BK's unique little neighborhoods, or how to get from one place to the other without HopStopping it first. The people are different and so is the vibe. While there are many MANY things I still don't know about Manhattan, I long ago achieved a level of comfort there that dissipates when I leave the borough. The times over the years that I've been to Brooklyn and Queens (the only parts of the Bronx that I know are Yankee Stadium and Lacey's apartment, and Staten Island can take Angelina and go far, far away as far as I'm concerned - please leave Vinny here though, love him) have shown me that, *gasp*, there's so much more to learn and see and experience in my beloved city that maybe, just maybe, I could get used to something else.

So...we shall see. Will I defy my Manhattan-is-the-best-place-ever ideals and consider living in a different borough? Only time will tell.

"It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride"

I am in a constant state of WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?

I spend way too much time and way too much money commuting into New York to go to a temp job that I'm pretty sure a 14 year-old could do. I don't read because I don't have time to go to the library, I don't go to the gym because my gym membership is in New York where I don't even freaking live, I don't devote the kind of attention to either of my blogs as I would like because the only writing time I have is during the day when I'm doing this receptionist thing and every train of thought gets interrupted by a Constantly. Ringing. Phone. I can't even make it to half the networking meetings I sign up for (remember that whole job search?) because I'm desperately trying to fit in the few remnants of normal life that I have right now - a rushed dinner with friends, a dodgeball game, catching up on TV shows - and I can't fully commit to anything so instead I end up half-assing everything. I feel like I'm always running for a train, and then when I get to where I'm going I turn right back around because it's time to go somewhere else and I end up not spending any quality time in either place.

There isn't much that's more hurtful to one's self esteem than looking for a job. Every day that goes by without so much as a prospect of an interview makes me feel that much more inadequate, that much more annoyed that many of my classmates are out using their brains and making 4 times what I'm making at this temp job. I'm missing the constant intellectual challenge of business school, and while I started my business blog as a way of keeping myself interested in business issues, there's really no match for being in a classroom and having a free exchange of ideas between professor and students. I know somewhere out there is a job opportunity that will challenge me and make me feel like a real, intelligent person again, but how to find it and how to convince someone that I'm worth taking a chance on is beyond me.

Because I live at home it's hard for me to make last minute plans. While I'm never opposed to planning in advance, I pride myself on being someone who will pick up and go to drinks/dinner/whatever NYC has to offer with almost no notice. Knowing that I can't stay anywhere too late because I have to go home in New Jersey puts a damper on being able to do things that I didn't know about at least a day in advance. Because even while I have many couches to crash on even at the last minute, it's always, "oh, I don't have a toothbrush/pajamas/clothes to wear to work tomorrow, but thanks anyway."

Forget about personal relationships. Many of my friendships have been relegated to some quick emails or gchats during the day. Meaningful conversation is limited and while I relish my weekends, which have somehow turned into a weekly episode of getting drunk before 3, it's just not enough. I don't get enough social time yet I also don't get enough personal time and how is that even possible?

Yesterday my friend asked me if I would play volleyball with her because her friend's team needed more women for a game that night. I already had gym clothes with me because of a dodgeball game so I thought, "HELL YES," because playing volleyball makes me feel like a real live person who has interests and who is good at something (I am not good at dodgeball, not even a little bit). And so I ran out at the end of my temp job to catch the train uptown, only to find that more than one subway line was completely f'ed up. 45 minutes later I was still wandering around the financial district, soaked due to a broken umbrella, trying to get uptown. I barely made it on time to my dodgeball game, which was an hour after volleyball was supposed to happen. Though it wasn't a big deal that I missed out, I had had this tiny morsel of being a fun, normal person dangling in front of me and the subway messed it up for me and I was crushed.

Right now I'm annoyed at myself for whining and annoyed at myself for this post which did not come out even remotely close to the eloquent thing I had planned in my head. I am not by any means miserable even though it might seem this way. I just want something to be FIGURED OUT. I want a job on the horizon, an apartment that maybe isn't mine yet but I know I'll be moving in soon, or a day where I can sit with my computer and write all the blog posts in my head with no interruptions, then watch all the TV I haven't caught up on and read a book. I'd also accept getting drinks with my friends without worrying about when the next train is or really any kind of activity that makes me feel like I am a smart, fun person who is in control of her time. Because right now I'm in the middle of all these places but I'm not fully anywhere, and somewhere on one of my many NJ Transit trips between states, I lost myself.

Dropping that third grade knowledge

I am giving you all a grammar lesson. Remember when I taught you all how to use the STRIKE? This is like that, only...not.

The following is a general rule. Many of you will say, "Oh pish posh, Arielle. We don't do that silly thing." And I say: "YES YOU DO." Ready?

DO NOT USE MOTHERF'ING APOSTROPHES WHEN PLURALIZING THINGS.

See what I did there? "Things." Not "Thing's."

WHO TAUGHT YOU CRETINS TO DO THAT?

I realize that my grammar is far from perfect and you are more than welcome to hate over on this way if your pet peeve involves ending sentences with prepositions because I love doing that even though I know better.

Seriously, though. Why has the apostrophe managed to sneak its way into our plurals the way that "LOL" has snuck into the lexicons of wayyyy too many people my age. (P.S. if you are a dude who says "LOL," I will never date you. Truth.)

Here are some examples of how to properly pluralize:

Machete --> Machetes
Popsicle --> Popsicles
Mojito --> Mojitos
Deer --> Deer (tricky, that one!)

Do you see any apostrophes? NO YOU DO NOT.

The only time where it is maybe acceptable to use them is where it would otherwise be confusing.

Instead of...

I got straight As.

It is okay if you say...

I got straight A's.

One reason why this is okay is because you might get confused otherwise and be all, "Girlfriend, straight as what? First of all you don't know when to capitalize letters, and second of all you didn't finish your sentence."

You call me "Girlfriend" because you're sassy.

The other reason why this is okay is because Wikipedia says so.

Okay, everyone. You have been schooled. Go forth and make me happy.

Why I don't like job hunting

I am still job hunting. And could be for awhile. Now that I'm on the cusp of reaching the 250 job applications mark (!!!), I've gotten all too familiar with some aspects of the job search that I don't like. Here goes!

1) When people tell me, "Don't worry, it's going to be fine." Yes, this is very easy for you to say when you have a cushy job and parents who still pay your cell phone bill. Talk to me when you have student loan debt going into repayment, health insurance to pay for (as in, the entire thing) and no job.

1a) Don't act like I'm disappointing you when I say I can't go on elaborate vacations. I'm really sorry that you want to go to Europe this fall and I can't join you. TOTAL BUMMER FOR YOU. Not.

2) I don't really ask for help with my job search. It's my own problem and no one else's. However, if you shove your business card down my throat and insist I send you my resume, I certainly don't expect you to find a job for me, but at least do me the favor of responding to my email. I probably spent a fair amount of time researching the company you work for and the available positions, and it's really a waste of my time if I never hear from you again.

3) Why the stigma about not finding out what a job pays until an offer is made? Let's be honest here - salary is one of the most important deciding factors for most people. I don't want to go through the effort of applying for a job that only pays half of what I want to make, and if companies would openly advertise that a position pays $150,000 a year, I'll know better than to apply for it because I'm clearly way too junior.

3a) For the hypothetical job above, if the (unmentioned) salary is the only way for me to know that I'm not qualified for this job, you wrote a job description that was either a) vague b) flat-out wrong or c) a magical mix of the two.

4) Just as I am supposed to be prepared for any conversation, so should you. If you say, "Why don't you have any employment on your resume after 2008?" you clearly didn't read the thing at the top of my resume that says, in bold, EDUCATION - MASTER OF BUSINESS ADMINISTRATION, MAY 2010. Similarly, if you select me for an interview and then ask me if I have experience with a slew of fun acronyms that appear nowhere on my resume and then mention that this experience is absolutely required for the job in a non-negotiable way, you really should have paid closer attention to my resume before deciding to interview me.

Phew, that's it. For now.

My irrational fear

Friends, I have a fear.

You know those people who, despite the clear use of headphones, still somehow manage to broadcast their music to everyone around them?

I'm afraid I'm one of them.

Now, I have no real reason to believe that I'm one of those people. I don't listen to my music at a particularly high volume, and no one has ever told me that they can hear what is supposed to be my own personal life soundtrack. But still, I worry. Especially when I hear others' music. Doubly especially now that I just bought new headphones (RIP white earbuds that came with my iTouch). Are these new headphones the kind that fail to keep the music confined to just MY ears? I have no idea.

The thing is, while I love my music and am not ashamed to admit to the wonderful people in my life about all the wealth of embarrassing material on my iPod, this isn't something I necessarily want random strangers to know.

99% of the time I listen to my music on shuffle. For whatever reason I never seemed to be able to get into playlists, mostly because I'd get bored of them too quickly. This means that at any given moment during my daily subway commute, I could be rocking out to more commonly accepted tunes like Paul Simon, Lady Gaga, or Green Day.

However, I could also be listening to "Uncle Fucker" from the South Park movie, the opening number from Bring It On (We cheer and we lead! We act like we're on speed! Hate us 'cause we're beautiful well we don't like you either!), Sandstorm by Darude (if you don't know what this is off the top of your head, Youtube it and have your subsequent "Oh yeaaah this song from high school" moment), or "Seize the Day" from Newsies.

Okay, I can't even pretend to be ashamed about that last one. That song is so uplifting! And..Newsies! Adorable.

This fear of my music being overheard is probably irrational. But I still worry. And will continue to do so.