Fun with OK Cupid

Tuesday, November 15, 2011
First of all, thanks everyone for your lovely comments/emails/texts regarding my last post. You are all super nice and lovely and caring.

Second of all, I found out today that there is a decent chance I won't have a job on 2012. Nothing is set in stone yet, but...are any of your companies looking to hire a totally awesome Project Manager? =)

And finally, while OK Cupid isn't exactly going as I had intended, I do have a few amusing messages that I want to share since that's what I promised with this whole project in the first place. So...here goes! My comments in italics.

In response to the profile question, "On Friday night I am most likely..." and my answer, "at happy hour":

wanna be in the happy hour with u


Just kind of love this one:
hey how u doing gorgeous u are so gorgeous like an angel i would love to get to know ua nd be friends


The following message is severely truncated because it is insanely long:
Before I begin this message I had to tell you what would be interesting to have on that TV show CSI. Imagine if on CSI they found semen in a woman's ear. Guess she heard her killer coming. Funny shit aint it :)

So.......

Hey there Arielle! I hope this message finds you well. I'm not going to write you message with one line that says ..."hey sexy" or "Sup baby!!" I'm sure you get that a lot anyway. I wanted to be original and something that’s against the normal and yet annoying messages you probably receive on a regular basis and I hope you appreciate it. I looked through your profile and it has piqued my interest and I’d like to know more about you. You definitely sound like a the right girl for me because you are LOW MAINTENANCE! I seem to keep attracting these high maintenance chicks who don't know that 1+1=2.

While you are attractive I do have to be honest with you: Currently I'm not looking to jump into anything serious as of yet. I would love to hang out and have ongoing casual sex with you. I know you are not looking for that but I just wanted to be upfront with you.


I hope English is not this man's first language:
hey my name is brian just wanted to write you see if you wanted to talk or write back .i wrote you because you seem like you would be a good convo and from your profile we seem to have alot in common not to mention your a beautiful woman.i guess if you want to write back and see what can happen hope to hear from you if not thanks for reading anyway


This is kind of hostile:
hi there, first of all, i am not a creep. too many girls just assume every guy on here is one. check out my profile and see if anything interests you. if so, shoot me a message. i am sick of writing shit and getting no responses.

Aaaaand that's it for now.

8 comments:

Suburban Sweetheart said...

The last one actually elicited a chuckle from me. Hostile indeed. Also, it's the WORST when guys start out by saying they're not creeps. If I thought everyone on there was a creep, I wouldn't be on there. By saying you're not a creep, you make me think you are - or at least that you have crappy self-esteem.

Ongoing casual sex, though, mmm, how appealing from a total stranger!

Ivonne said...

I literally LOL'ed at the CSI joke one. That was really funny!

I have an OK cupid but never check it anymore. Maybe I should.

MonsteRawr said...

I love it, I fucking LOVE it.

To give credit where credit is due, Guy #3 correctly used and spelled "piqued." And you have to admit, that's kinda sexy.

MonsteRawr said...

Okay, for the sake of science, I just asked my husband how to spell "piqued" as in "My interest was piqued," and he spelled it "peaked." So, yeah, spelling is sexy.

Jessica (Bayjb) said...

OMG the last one is the best. Also, I cannot take anyone who sends an email (which they have time to write) with bad misspellings or abbreviations for words. I mean, come on.

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Wow. And that's why I'm probably not ever going to use an online dating site. The punctuation alone would send me into a rage.

terra said...

WOW. Boys are ridiculous. That's what this is teaching me. And that last one? Amazing.

Mega said...

This is awesome. And I'm crossing my fingers for you on the job front. Hit me up for job deets.

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